You know when you apply for a job or some kind of commitment, and you don't really think very hard about it, and then it comes up as a real opportunity, even though you thought deep down, "I would never be good enough", and you are in this mess of deciding what to do? Well that is me. I applied for my 'dream job' as a nanny in Italy, and, well, I got a call from the agency! The woman was totally impressed with my resume and informed me I could get a top nanny position with qualifications like that. (Uni has been useful after all!) So she gave me one day to decide. Not long I know, but I set about thinking, praying and asking family and friends what they thought I should do. My Dad and Mum were like straight away "No, don't go! We will miss you too much!" Most of my friends said it would be an awesome experience and that I should do it. But something didn't sit right with me...
Eventually I found myself thinking, "What is life all about? What is it for?" and I realised that it was relationships that I live for. Friends, family, kids at Sunday School, housemates, aquaintances, even people in my community that I might only meet once in my life; if I up and leave and run away to Italy I would be leaving all this behind. Yes, at least half of those people would still be here when I got back (God-willing), but my relationship with them would be lacking. In a way, it would be broken. And what would going to Italy achieve? An excellent, unique experience for sure, but what do experiences prove to the people I love when I am not there for them, and they miss me so much it hurts?
As you can see, I am faced with a difficult decision. But ultimately, as my pastor said, I need and want to be where I can best live and breathe the gospel of Jesus. So I think it is here in Tassie that I will stay. I'm excited about the holiday club Nonie and I are planning for the needy kids in the area, I want to spend more time with my sister and see her get better, and my Opa is rather sick. I need to be here for these people. This is where God has plonked me, so it is here I will serve him and do my best!
